gnits eht

"I don't know if you can hear me, _______, but there's something I want to tell you; I love you."

"I'm so scared, _____. I don't know what to do."

"Just wake up, _______. Please.. just wake up."

"I don't understand what you mean."

"Just wake up..."

This shouldn't bother me as much as it does

But i already know how shitty i am with everything i do. Writing, in particular, has turned into beating a dead horse.

Disadvantages brought upon myself at some fucked convention i can accept, but I mean, what does it tell you when seemingly everyone in this has at least been honorably mentioned for a random selected piece of writing by the adviser, himself?

Whats even shittier is i don't know if i can do better. I'm not sure if i'm even motivated to do better. Why is this feeling of gratification so important anyway?


This is half of why i've already chosen to not come back.

At least now i know this isn't for me anymore.



I've slumped past complacent mediocrity.